In the six months I’ve been writing on substack, this is the topic I feel the most called to speak about and the one I have most dreaded diving into. Everything I have written about childhood trauma is the scaffolding for this topic. I’d hoped it would feel more natural and gentle by now, but it doesn’t. I don’t expect discussing how large the umbrella of childhood sexual abuse really is will feel rewarding but I know it is important. This three part series is not for everyone, but there are more of us for whom this is relevant than we want to admit.
All of us have at least a beginning concept of what qualifies as childhood sexual abuse.
Dr. Dan Allender defines it as any contact or interaction—whether visual, verbal, or psychological—in which a vulnerable person (such as a child or adolescent) is used for the sexual stimulation or gratification of an older, stronger, or more influential person. This includes any touching, rubbing, or exposure to pornography meant for the offender's pleasure and is possible because of a fundamental betrayal of trust and misuse of authority to groom or coerce a victim.
This is what I refer to as OVERT sexual abuse. It’s something you could capture on camera. It involves physical contact and is clearly violating even if the beginning stages of grooming are hazy. The heartbreaking reality is that this is only part of what qualifies as childhood sexual abuse. There are many other categories of COVERT childhood sexual abuse that leave survivors battling the same emotions and symptoms but without the clarity of why.
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